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  • Forgiveness: Why?

    20 Sep 2015
    Truth & Foster Care

    Ephesian 4:26

    AMPC- when angry, do not sin; do not ever let your mouth (your exasperation your fury or indignation) last until the sun goes down.

    My grandma always told me never go to bed angry, and never let anger stop you from getting a good nights rest. I love my grandma, but this can be said about anything. Don’t allow grudges, hate, envy, jealousy consumes your heart and mind; when your energy can be used for greatness. Don’t allow what others say and think about you to enable you from succeeding and enjoying your day. It’s good to feel emotions, it means your human. It’s what you do with your emotions that makes the difference.

    So, practice when someone does something mean towards you, in you own time say; “I forgive you”. Forgiveness isn’t for the other person but for yourself. Forgiveness allows you to heal, and to maintain sound-judgment. They say forgive and forget. I say forgive every time you can. Forget when you feel like your ready. Forgetting can prevent from experiencing true forgiveness, the stress that will be released from your body, and the healing of your heart. It’s not always immediately, but it’s better late than never. When you truly forgive, don’t bring it up in every conversation, for, forgiveness is a true release.

    I’m not an angry person and will forgive anyone 100 times over, before I hold a grudge and go to bed angry. I guess another piece to that scripture is that, not every day is promised, not everyone wakes up everyday (some die). So, do you really want to go to bed angry, and it could be the last emotion you experience.

    I rather build a relationship, have it restored and change what went wrong; remembering the good times then the temporary bad times. Good always win. Just like in the movies. Bottom-line, always forgive, and be slow to anger. Anger and emotions will make you do and say things you’ll never be able to take back. It will destroy a relationship, and you will need to decide does the good out weighs the bad; is it really worth giving up?

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  • What has happened to the: Ole’ Negro Soul

    17 Sep 2015
    Truth & Foster Care

    The Black church wasn’t founded on the grounds of discrimination, religious intolerance, hate and false ideologies. No! It was founded in a time of despair, in a time of racial segregation, racial intolerance, limited education, limited funds, and separation.

    The Black Church Ole’ Negro Soul was birth in the fields own by slave masters that was attended by Negro’s who were not worth a penny. We were sold, made fools of, raped, killed, lynched, beaten, given little food, considered property and separated from our families. What kept us together was unity, faith in a God bigger than us and hope. As we worked those fields, cleaned houses, called “niggers”, and endured true slavery- we sang what are called Ole’ Negro songs, about God and how our future generations would have it better. They didn’t kill each other like we’re doing. Our Black Brothers are killing each other. Brother vs. Brother. We’re doing what was done to us by the police, masters and society and killing one another.

    The Ole’ Negro prayers birth leaders like MLK, who fought discrimination and hate with peace. Fought injustice with the power of education, and knowing our God given rights. I am only four generations away from slavery. It wasn’t that long ago, my ancestors were praying for my future, my parents future, and grandparents future. No!

    The Black church was a place that taught politics, taught each other how to read, empowered one another, prayed and ate together. Under pressure, under fire, facing and accepting the realization that death was at our door; we kept on moving. The first book we were taught to read was the bible, the truth of God, and each story with a negative beginning had a powerful end. The greats was the birth of Jesus, who came with “Good news.” The church was a place of where we cried out to Jesus with our boisterous voice, dance in praise, spoke in unknown tongues and spoke life for a better generation.

    The Ole’ Negro Soul- gave birth to leaders like W. E. B Du Bois, leaders like Malcolm X, Dr. Martin Luther King Jr. The voice of writers like Zora Neal Hurston, Alice Walker, Dr. Maya Angelou, Langston Hughes. The songs of singers like Ella Fitzgerald, Josephine Baker, and Mahalia Jackson. The Ole’ Negro soul, knew we would have a African American President. John Lewis, Oprah Winfrey, Toni Morrison, Earl Stafford, Dr. Sheryl W. Barnes, Revend King, Pastor Martha V. Green (local affluent black leaders) T.D Jakes, Condelezza Rice and so much more. My mayor: Toni Harp. These African American people are still fighting for our voices, rights and believing in out abilities. We have to keep the fight.

    To my brothers and sisters lets not forget about our history, the four black girls killed and how the community came together. The fight to vote, police beatings, dogs biting our youth, unable to attend school, burned churches and burdened hearts. Lets not forget where we come from! Lets be the change we are demanding from our government. Let’s take office, lets vote, attend town hall meetings, turn off the tv and listen to the presidential address. Stay focus. Even in our music we’ve lost our voice. Our woman were raped, shamed and beaten naked, and abused, we’ve forgotten where we come from, and show our privates, “twerk” doing everything we were once forced to do. BET wasn’t founded on that, but I do believe it’s forgotten it’s roots and now we rap about drugs, killings, sex, money instead of building our community.

    Historically Black Colleges/Universities are so expensive because after we graduate no one will donate back into the institutions making it hard for brothers and sisters to attend. Some have become so prestigious that we pick through tests created against the minority community to determine if you are good enough for an education. EVERY ONE HAS A RIGHT TO EDUCATION. Why are we making it so hard for our brothers and sisters, trying to make a difference. We deny them access, and so much many won’t apply because they don’t feel like they’re Howard material, Spellman worthy or Morehouse worthiness.

    Where is the Ole’ Negro Soul? I think of our older generations the ones that are dying off, we need to take heed to their word, listen to their testimonies and use their passion and start a new revolution, built on our truths and faith. The generations that fought, walked and marched. We’ve forgotten where we’ve come from and confirmed to a world that is not right. We are killing one another, hating one another, relying on government handouts and destroying ourselves with words, guns and lies. Where is that Ole’ Negro Soul, who fought to stay together.

    Don’t forget our history, our fights, our dreams, our voice and who helped made it a reality. What do you think Dr. Martin Luther King would say if he saw us today? It’s not enough to have a black president. It starts at home, in our communities and schools. Take charge, for yourself, your children for our God! I can’t speak for other races, I can only speak for mine. But every race needs to stick true to there roots and progress.

    What has happened to the Ole’ Negro Soul?

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  • I’m convinced: You’ll Make it

    17 Sep 2015
    Truth & Foster Care

    A Pastor preached tonight and said: I’m convinced, You’ll make it.

    We are all going through something in our lives; keep on living (there’s an upside) We need to realized that seasons (life’s circumstances) will change. So my question to those who question God, and believe in God: What does it really mean to live? What does it really mean to live for/with God?

    Blessings aren’t always materialistic. Sometimes just being able to walk is a blessing; there’s someone out there that can’t. In every struggle God is there and even if you doubt, can’t feel him; know he’s there. You still have to stand. Don’t give up on God and on Life. God’s never given up on you. Even when it feel like you’re alone, STAND! No one’s life is meant to be easy, every one is given a specific journey to take with the hope that they will give back to a life.

    It’s when you’re in your darkest spot, you’ll find out how strong you really are. Trouble, trials, circumstances, can either make you, or break you. What we need to realize is that we at some point, we have a choice, to give up or keep trying, and know that we’ve given it our best. And, we’ll keep on trying. These road blocks, I believe are test of character, patience and will power.

    So embrace the pain, in knowing that the greatest glory in life is when you rise every time. Dr. Angelou said it the best, “Like Dust, We Rise” Seasons we must go through just like a life has beginning and a life had an ending. In everything there’s a purpose, my brother and my sister: in everything there is a PURPOSE. You’re not in this alone, even when no one responds to your text messages or answers you phone calls. You’re not alone.

    “Like Dust, You Rise!” You’re not the first to experience pain, not will you not be the last. I hope you don’t feel like I’m trying minimize what you’re going through. I’m not! But someone, somewhere has been through the same thing, and survived- you will too! There will be feelings of abandonment, bitter words, silence, “You Rise” Even Jesus had disciples. Even Jesus was not alone. There is a God, Allah, Buddah (where ever you’re in your faith) that will and has encouraged you, and sent people to encourage you. Never allow negative people and experiences: take you out. You’re stronger than you know.

    I’m convinced: You’ll Make it. Remember my brothers, and my sisters, black, white, gay, transgender, bi, str8, baptist, muslim no matter who you are, or your faith, I’m convinced when present with hard time, you’re presented with the opportunity to grow into and deeper to your person, and fulfill your purpose.

    Your season of Change is coming, your season of pain is ending, and you have everything you already need to make it even if it doesn’t look like it. Trust me. I was going to kill myself tonight, and then I went to a church service and was reminded of my God, my strength and how I’ve come through so much. I can make it. Eventually, in your time of trouble you will have two options, 1. give up or 2. keep trying.

    Will you have faith in yourself? Will you trust in an invisible God/deity? Will you trust that there is sometime bigger than you, who knows the future and plans for your life, and will never let you fall, and stay down. My boss told me this week, “Mia, I’ll give you the hours, don’t let me down.” In crutches, and in pain, I kept my word. Made it to my shift, took my brakes, made drinks, took orders and conquered today. So to Jenn (boss), ” I know, you had know idea of how hard it is for me to work with my pain, to stand for hours, and just to smile when I want to cry, and give up on life permanently. But I’m a woman of my word. Just like my God, who is a God of his word. I came to work, for the business, to prove to you that I could do it, and to encourage myself”

    I’m convinced: Together, You and I will make it. Just like I’m making it!

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  • Like Dust, I Rise

    16 Sep 2015
    Truth & Foster Care

    Last night I had written my final wishes, and will; saying my good-bye, having my last words be “I’ve tried.” I always talked about killing myself, and I’ve had attempts. After being assaulted, and getting hit by a car, I felt so alone. My aunt and Dad said that sometimes we have to go through things physically alone but God is always there. Last night, I called my aunt to pray with me, the final prayer I would ever hear, because tonight 9/16/2015 I was going to kill myself, and not reach out to anyone. I didn’t want it to be seen as a cry for attention, and I didn’t want to burden anyone else. I was also told that if you are really going to kill yourself, you don’t talk about it; you just do it. That was my plan.

    On crutches I’ve been going to work, and by God’s grace getting home. I heard that there was church, and my pastor was going to be there. I knew in my heart, that I needed to go. I knew in my heart that if I never have another friend, if I limp and take the bus for the rest of my life that God would still be there. I knew it, but I needed to hear it. I needed to see familiar faces of  from the one who poured into my heart and my soul. I also knew I needed to hear from God.

    I had forgotten at how much I’ve survived, and the wonderful people whom have blessed my life. I had forgotten about those who answered their phone nightly and prayed with me. I forgot about how much support I really have. I forgot how strong I really am. I forgot about God, and his importance in my life. I wanted to give up, allowing life, to take me out. A woman I look up to: Min. Barnes said “I’m a warrior” and then she said “even warriors need rest.” I realized, my rest is in a God that you cannot see, sometimes can’t hear, or, understand. But I had to take rest in remembering what in knowing my life will get better; I will succeed, and my dreams, goals,  to reach out to youth in foster care will happen

    I will not take my own life. That’s not how my story is going to end. I make that choice. Yes, I’ll get depressed. Yes, I’ll get manic. Yes, I might have hallucinations. I will have struggles, and face hard times. Everyone will, more than once; but as Maya Angelou said, “Like Dust, I RISE.”  I have no idea what tomorrow will look like. I have no idea where I’ll be next month, but I know I’ll be alive! Because giving up is a choice, I fought to hard to make it to where I am. I’m not ready to say good-bye.

    Today 9/16/2015 I choose life.

    Pastor Paula White says “do not cure your crisis-use it; for it’s in times of the crisis that your courage, faith, and strength, lets you live an undefeated life.

    I’d like to add: it’s time of crisis that you are being molded into the person God has mean’t for you to be. It’s building you, and not destroying you.

    Choose life with me, and lets make it together.

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