My Journey, My Style

Change your thinking, Change your life

6 Jan 2015

Truth & Foster Care

“If I continue to think as I have always thought, I will continue to act as I’ve always acted. If I continue to act as I’ve always acted, I will continue to get what I’ve always gotten.” – Anonymous

It’s a new year and I challenge you with hope. that you’ll challenge yourself to live a life of purpose on purpose. Start by changing the way you think. Positive thoughts. For “what a man think, so is he!” If you want something new for your life in 2015 “think it” until you believe it and then it will be so.

I believe 2015 will be a prosperous year. If we decide to take control of our lives and decide, this year will not be like any other years, it will change our thoughts, change our actions and give us a better result. Don’t be discouraged. Don’t let anyone stop you from being a better you. Do what will make your dream and goals come true.

2015 is OUR year!

Domenia L Dickey

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My forever family

31 Dec 2014

Truth & Foster Care

Today 12/31/2014 is my last day as a ward of the state. I have officially aged out of Connecticut’s foster care system. I am on my own! No more social workers, stressful family visits and or six month reviews. At age 17 I meet a family that would become my forever family. I remember telling them that I was not meant for a family and that I didn’t know how to function within a family. . I warned my mom and family of my mental health, that it drains me and the people around me; every negative reason I could think of was my excuse because history had taught me that I was no good and didn’t deserve a family.

They took me in anyways. It was hard, I’m hospitalized often, we fought, I moved out, and moved back in. Some days I wanted to never talk to them again and we even hurt each other’s feelings. However, they didn’t get give up on me. Sometimes I wish they did. My mom said “you are the daughter we chose and sometimes families fight.” I’m still getting adjusted

Not to mention I have a “Dad.” I’m too blessed.

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Letter to Domenia

15 Dec 2014

Truth & Foster Care

So I must be honest and say, I have my struggles. I struggle with mental health. I was diagnosed with psychosis (auditory and visual hallucination), mood disorder nos, adhd and borderline personality disorder. It’s a struggle to get out of bed. It’s a struggle to complete simple tasks. Like showering. Currently, I can’t work more than 30 hours a week. Which makes living hard. I am a full time student, in therapy, with two part time jobs.

I struggle with feeling alone and feeling abandon. I am very hard on myself, and expecting myself to be the best. Because good is never enough. I want to live a life driven on PURPOSE. To be effective, a motivator, history maker, public voice, leader, advocate and teacher.

I want what seems to be impossible. One day I hope to attend UCLA, American University or George Washington University law school. To talk with young people in foster care with low self esteem, I want to be an “ear” for the next generation. I want them to succeed and help them so that eventually they can help someone else too.

I am not sure why I wrote this post but I guess I wrote it to say:

Dear Domenia,

I love you. You’re strong and it’s okay to recognize that at time you’ll need help. Nothing happens over night. You have survived foster care, abuse, rape and neglect; you’ve been homeless and poor and in yet, you pull through. Life will not always be this hard. There is a sun over the mountain. God is with you and loves you. You will attend great universities and earn your degrees. You’ll reach millions and inspire the lives of young people. You can make it and you will make it. If no one says that they love you, know that I (you) love you. I (you) am cheering for you. I (you) will never let you down. Life is a journey, a play with no rehearsal. you’ve made it thus far keep going until God calls your number. It’s okay to cry for it does not mean that you are weak. You will succeed ‘n make it. You’re, your only road block. God Bless. May God send his angles to cover you in your time of pain, depression, sadness and success.

Love,

YOURSELF (DOMENIA L. DICKEY)

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Good Bye Foster Care

11 Nov 2014

Truth & Foster Care

In a month in a half I will be aging out of the state foster care system, moving to a new state and attending a new university. I am not sure how I should feel. For the journey in foster care wasn’t an easy one but the state of CT foster care system became my parents. They raised me!

I guess in a way I feel institutionalized, I’ve always had health insurance, a place to stay (foster homes, shelters and group homes), and social workers. I will now have to pay co-pays for my medication, continue my education, afford my education; find housing on my own, and manage a job, school, church and mental health.

Life in 23 years has taught me to have a voice, advocate for myself, knowing that it’s okay to cry, my history has made me victorious and not a victim. I have not always had a stable family for support, I mean, my family did what they could; my biological mother tried and I have every right to hate her and my family for allowing me to get hurt and leaving me in a state system, but, it’s not how I am going to start my journey as a young adult and it wasn’t meant to be any other way.

I can’t believe it, I’ve survived and have successfully aged out of the the CT’s foster care system! No more court dates, family visits, worrying about living in group homes and foster families. It feels great. I feel freedom. I feel joy. I feel fear.

I am moving to another state (Florida) and attending Palm Beach Atlantic University. I have a new found responsibility of taking control of my life. I feel a release and a breakthrough from my past, my family, organize religion and labels. I’m starting over and free to live a life worth living for. I know my fears will subside and I will find my balance. I’ve been given the experience and support to make it.

I’m just excited to leave, and I hope when I am traveling to college that I see a sign that says:

Welcome Domenia L. Dickey to West Palm Beach, Florida and Palm Beach Atlantic University.

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