My Journey, My Style

Christian Reflection

2 Nov 2013

Topic Thought.

I believe in God. I believe in Jesus. I believe in the Holy Spirit.

Lets get that straight.

I don’t pray as much as I should. In my head I tell myself that I don’t want to be that individual that prays when things are only wrong and to not be grateful for the good. Prayers isn’t a ritual and there is no right way to go about it, it’s a simple conversation from the heart.

I recently lost my job. I’m still not over it. Yes, yes I did pray to God for another job; who wouldn’t? However I begin to rest my mind and reflect on my past. I am a survivor. I survived rape, beatings, homelessness, hunger, being dirty, broke and alone; I will do it again. I prayed and thank-God for the opportunity to stop and reflect. It sucks to not have a job, but there will be another one.

I called my mom to tell her I feel at peace. I expressed that I am not troubled and I feel like a solider who just devoured their enemies.

In the book of Matthew, there is a story about how we are not to worry for tomorrow. For tomorrow has always taken care of itself. The example that was given were pigeons, who don’t worry about there next meal is but they know it will be there. We are expected to lean on God, and believe that God knows what’s best. If a pigeon doesn’t worry, then why should I. It’s an example. An analogy.

We are spiritual beings having a humanistic experience. Like Peter who used his faith and walked on water to Jesus. I’ll use mine and live day by day

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Note to self!

14 Sep 2013

Topic Thought.

WE ARE SPIRITUAL BEINGS HAVING A HUMANISTIC EXPERIENCE. -PASTOR PAULA WHITE

Hmmmmmm…

We are world changers and history makers! By changing ourselves, growing and learning through education, and we are on a spiritual and physical journey. We are all given obstacles that makes our journey different, given a problem to solve and a ladder to climb.

We can either “fight” or “flight.” Our choice. Our decision. Our Journey. Our style.

We are not the only ones affected by our change. We are not the only ones impacted by our decisions to go “left” or “right.” However, this is a personal choice!

There are those who blame their past; they blame the abuse, mistreatment, neglect and abandonment as a reason for their actions. No matter what has happened, God still gives us freewill. I am not trying to demeanor your experience but I am not playing the “sympathy” card either. We are not given more than we can bare. We can make it and will, if we want to!

I firmly believe that there is a soul that we are meant to connect with. I believe that there is a heart we are meant to help heal. There is a child or adult waiting to hear your story, so that they might continue the “good fight” of faith because they too are “world changers and history makers.”

We stand in the middle of our path and future. We stand in between our past and God given destiny.

We are all given a task some big and small. However, both are important, not one more than the other. Our task is something that only we can do, and, is not something we can hand to someone else.

I used to ask God why me? What did I do to deserve such pain? I told God I hated him because I couldn’t understand his way of thinking. Children are innocent but in yet are hurt. Why?

I never got an answer to every question. However I thought about my life and the over-comers that I now know, and the journey and heart that I have. I say thank-you because now I’m on a mission to speak to every heart that has an ear to listen. I have a destiny and it’s to touch millions in all nations.

My journey. My style

7 comments on Note to self!
I’m black and Bipolar!

29 Apr 2013

Being African American, Topic Thought.

There needs to be a mental health awareness for the African American Community. I hate being judged. I am no different bipolar than I am being a queer. I’m still Domenia Dickey! Geesh! I take meds, they work, they allow me to have a healthy life and a stable life. It’s no different then medication for high blood pressure.

Almost everyone I know takes meds even my grandma, and no one says otherwise. But when I take my meds it’s a problem and I need to “pray” it away.

There is no shame in taking them, it doesn’t make me less of a person. Why is the black community afraid to acknowledge the importance of mental health. Parents will not permit their children to see a therapist, my family used to hide my meds from me.

Every time I take my meds, they say “you don’t need them, it’s in your head.” True, it is in my head which is why I take them.

I get so annoyed with the black community because I feel as though they support ignorance; and because of that the old and young are perishing. Every time I see a black man, homeless, with schizophrenia; I am compelled to think about the help he could have received when he was younger, but his family just said “no.”

The black community picks and chooses what they will and will not accept. We can accept our boys wearing their pants to their knees, teen pregnancy, lack of college education, and entitlement attitudes; but we can not accept that bipolar, anxiety, depression, ocd, adhd, mood disorders, eating disorders and much more effects the black community. We are not exempt! By living in denial we are only hurting our community and our youth and young adults.

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Foster Care

23 Apr 2013

Truth & Foster Care

Babies, toddlers, pre-teens, teenagers and young adults who are in care across this world who feel as though they are not meant to be a apart of a family; believing that they break up families; thinking they are the problem. This is a LIE! Untrue! Every one wants the babies, but what about us; the:

– “big kids” the ones with a history
– mental illness
– insecurities
– wanna be thugs
– outcasts

What about US! What about US?

I told my foster mother at the age of 17, that I was a child not meant for a family. I believed I was the cause of hurt, that I bring instability, and break hearts. I had to remind her I’m bipolar, I come with baggage. I am out spoken and I don’t hold back my voice. She didn’t care, I was still taken in.

We need more of theses individuals. If you can’t be a mom or a dad, what about being a mentor. We need to know that there is something else out there.We need to know that we are not limited by our circumstances. We can live a healthy life, we can attend college, we have a voice and we matter. We need to know at night that:

-pain
-tears
-being misunderstood
-anger
-disappointment
-forgiveness with in ourselves

will pass away. “this too shall pass” was the words that I held onto, at 21 life is scary, tomorrow I can be homeless, tomorrow I could be alone without help, but I have to believe that “this too shall pass” and there is much more to my journey. I have more teens to connect with, more speeches to prepare for, more souls and heart to connect with.

What about “US.” What about “US” We need you!

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Christian Reflection

Note to self!

I’m black and Bipolar!

Foster Care