My Journey, My Style

Boston Marathon

16 Apr 2013

Topic Thought.

You will make it through this! You are not alone you have a nation standing beside you, praying for you. You are stronger than you know, you’ll make, you’ll shed tears,you’ll scream, curse God, you will feel fear; this is expected for we are human created and programmed with emotions. No matter what, you’ll make it through this, I won’t stop praying until every heart has been healed and every child can sleep without fear. It may take years, but it will be worth it. You’ll make it, you’ll find strength that you never thought you had, and you are going to change history and the faith of humanity will be restored once again. This too shall pass.

1 comment on Boston Marathon
Change of Seasons.

2 Dec 2012

Topic Thought., Truth & Foster Care

The truth is that everyone in your life is there for a season. As we know seasons come and go and so do people in our lives. We will have friends and family members who are meant to be in your life for a certain amount of time, that can be a few years, a life time, a month or a few days. It’s important to recognize that and to be thankful for them being there and what they have contributed to your life.

The hardest is when it’s family but it’s true. I always say, be thankful for what they taught you, and the time you spent together and also respect and know that as time continues and you grow, you change and so does others around you. Life is about growth, adjustment, change and developing into the person you were predestined to be.

You can do all things for I believe God has given you strength to accomplish every obstacle and climb every mountain. You were predestined to do great things and to reach out, to help another individual reach higher heights in their own life.

I truly believe we do not live life for ourselves. I truly believe we are connected to others for a reason and that reason is to grow! I believe that there are people that we are meant to connect with, and there are people waiting to hear your story, shake your hand, open a door to another area in life.

So I say trust God (or whom ever you believe in) and know that at every tunnel there is a light and you don’t struggle, cry, or experience life’s journey just because. there is someone who is waiting to hear your truth, there is another person or persons that your are meant to connect with and for the two of you to be an added light in this world to make a better place. There are people who will be against such change, and will try to bring you down, and hurt and attempt to stop you from growing. You will cry, scream, sometimes feel alone abandoned etc..but you have to keep pushing there is more to your life then you can see right now. I promise!

So don’t be afraid of letting go, even if it’s your mom, brother/sister, best friend, father or grandmother. You have to continue to grow and don’t let anyone stop you. I pray this blog reaches someone and they continue their journey with faith in themselves and their purpose. Seasons change and we grow.

Love you all!

3 comments on Change of Seasons.
Thanksgiving and foster care

22 Nov 2012

Truth & Foster Care

There was a time when I was young in foster care when I switched from different homes, group homes, and foster homes and all I had were two trash bags and a teddy bear. I clearly remember laying on a bed and wishing it was mine forever. I remember be counted as homeless and sent to live in a shelter with grown boys 45mins away from my home city. I was 11 years old. I remember I went a half a winter without a coat. I had a sweatshirt until my aunt gave me a coat. I cried. To this day I don’t think she knows how grateful I am for that coat.

I remember waiting for my mom to visit and she never showed up. I remember late nights when my grandma would hold me and tell me it’s okay, grandma is here. I remember crying because my mother either didn’t show up or was late for court dates, family sessions- you name it.

I know what it’s like to have family members call you a liar, being bullied by cousins and feeling alone. I remember writing in my diary hoping to find the perfect parents so my twin and I could live together one more time. I wrote list of people I prayed that God would tell them to be my foster mom or dad.

I remember living in group homes and getting only weekend visits with my grandma and aunts. I know what it’s like to only have enough clothes for the week, using toilet paper as a maxi pad, one tooth brush, switching social workers every day, trying to comb my “thick” hair, spending my 13th birthday in a psych ward, I tried to kill myself because I felt so alone, granted visits twice a month with my twin, hardly seeing my family, my teddy bear became that home for me. I remember being sexually abused by the age of 6, and tortured by my twin. I know what it’s like to see your mom get beat have her life threatened. I know what it’s like to have a gun pointed to your head and forced to give a stranger oral sex and I know what it’s like to be poor and having only Kool-Aid and spaghetti to eat for dinner.

The last true hug I received from my mom, I was in first grade and she honestly said that I love you.

This is the first thanksgiving where I have a job, apartment, my same teddy bear, attend college, a computer and a family I created over the years; I have more than three coats, I have clothes that I bought with my own money, my family and I are connected and trying to reach out to one another. I’m thankful for my journey and my continue success.

It’s the little things that makes me happy. I didn’t get to see my twin this holiday, but I know he feels my love and my energy.

Happy Thanksgiving

1 comment on Thanksgiving and foster care
Religion is a box.

26 Jul 2012

Topic Thought.

My definition of religion:

The core foundation of hypocrites who strongly hold beliefs that binds, and suppress people. about one self A hidden mask of lies that is portrayed as truth.

Religion:

1. the box that keeps people captive but is supposed to promote freedom.

2. Based on man-made traditions.

3. the mask that will never offer a resolution

4. kills and causes war

5. tells us to lie to ourselves and feel holy and sanctified

6. tells us how to judge and to take the role of “god” for ourselves

7. has attempted to kill faith

8. Filled with ignorant people who cannot think for themselves

9. allows for excuses to atrocious behaviors

10. A political statement and a mockery of “GOD”

11. Religion doesn’t know GOD!

12. Religion is a BOX!

13. Religion is a curse not a blessing. Religion is a arrogant, self-centered, self authorized, and demeaning rhetorical thought

I hold these truths to be self-evident that religion is mans worst enemy (that we created) and needs to die.

Jesus was and has been out of the box-which was hard for people to accept that he broke “religious laws/rule” for they did no good. These laws prevented people from learning about God and living an abundant life.” He defeated that law that excluded people. Many are angry with GOD, it’s not “his” fault, it’s the fault of the people who false testified, preached, prayed and evangelize his holy word, for money, fame and revenge. Jesus ran from such crowds.

We think we know God, but we often see the people who are supposed to represent him instead.

1 comment on Religion is a box.

Boston Marathon

Change of Seasons.

Thanksgiving and foster care

Religion is a box.